Posts Tagged ‘attention’
Add Sizzle to Your Surroundings
Is your home décor lacking that extra something that spells the difference between comfortable and vibrant or between comfortable and tranquil? Candles might be just the polish your décor needs. Take advantage of the sparkling colors, rich textures, and fresh scents of candles without draining your decorating budget.
Some candles are best unadorned, but candleholders offer an additional opportunity to highlight their presence and beauty. You don’t have to burn the candles; you can use them as objects d’art, incorporating them into displays, floral arrangements and centerpieces-alone as an accent piece, or in a grouping as a focal point.
Typical candles no longer exist-they belong to a bygone era. Tapers gave way to thick and varied heights long ago. Today, you’ll find square candles, heart-shaped candles, fruit and vegetable candles, gingerbread candles, floral candles, Christmas tree and ornament candles, and candles with artistic free-flowing shapes. Within that variety of shapes, you’ll find an endless array of adornments, such as beads and glitter, straw, botanicals embedded in the wax, still life scenes, etc.
Color, Shape and Texture
Today’s candles come in a wide variety of hues and shades, and many add the dimension of shape and texture to their composition. Marbled, frosted, and sculptured candles are widely available in a selection of sizes, shapes and prices-ranging from votives to thick, oversized candles.
If your living areas are frozen in time with a monochromatic color scheme-you know the rooms we mean, they looked oh-so-good on paper until you lived in them for a month-use candles to rescue you from the monotony without the expense of redecorating. Marbled candles are a quick and easy way to work complementary or harmonizing color into the room.
If your home utilizes color well, but lacks excitement, accessorize with textured candles to add pizzazz to the room. Position the candles to create a focal point or to add just the right accent. Marbled candles incorporate several hues and shades of the same color, and variegated candles can tie all of the colors in your décor together.
Sculptured candles provide a warm substitute for expensive knickknacks and require a minimum of space. Add smaller sculptured candles to guest bathrooms along with guest hand towels and guest soaps. It’s the attention to detail that rolls out the welcome mat for guests and creates the ambiance of a memorable stay.
If you’ve never used anything but wax candles, try one of the new gel candles. Gel candles are translucent and their shimmering glow is irresistible to the eye. You’ll find gel candles ready to display in their own attractive glass containers.
Candles and Fragrance
Scented and aromatherapy candles make an excellent choice for the kitchen, bedroom or bathroom. Consider odor-neutralizing scented candles a necessity for the kitchen when you entertain. They serve triple duty by quickly neutralizing cooking odors, adding a pleasant scent and a touch or warmth. Larger scented candles often include interesting texture, shape and color variation.
Candleholders and Display Options
If you use your patio as a three-season outdoor room, float citronella votives in water on the patio for a lily-pads-in-the-pond effect. You’ll scare away the mosquitoes and other flying irritants at the same time. Place all citronella candles a few feet from the table so that you don’t run off the guests along with the insects.
Votive holders have blossomed into every imaginable shape, including butterflies, bejeweled beveled glass holders, and seascape holders. Many of the votive designs are ideally suited for an outdoor environment.
Hurricane lamps add light and atmosphere to the outdoor table in the evening. Eve lights can produce harsh lighting, and hurricane lamps provide enough light to see without detracting from the atmosphere. When selecting a candleholder for outdoor use, it’s important to select one that shields the flame from the wind, and hurricane lamps provide ample protection from the wind.
If you haven’t seen the newer tea lamp candleholders, you’re not going to believe your eyes. These candleholders are every bit as elaborate and intricate as their electrical counterparts. If you prefer the formal look of a chandelier, consider a chandelier candleholder for a soft, diffused light. The next time a storm or tornado blows through your area, leaving you without electricity, tea lamp, hurricane and chandelier candleholders will be ready and waiting.
Whatever your décor, imaginative use of candles and candleholders allows you to change your décor as often as you change your mood.
M J Plaster is a successful author who provides information on shopping online for candle holders and candles in general. M J Plaster has been a commercial freelance writer for almost two decades, most recently specializing in home and garden, the low-carb lifestyle, investing, and anything that defines la dolce vita.
I?m Not Depressed; I?ve Just Been Having A Lousy Conversation With Myself
Not long ago, I attended a mastermind group. During the meeting, one of the women went into a litany about how terrible things had been in the past few weeks and how depressed she felt as a result. Inspired, I rose from my seat and told her, “You’re not depressed, you’ve just been having a lousy conversation with yourself.” She looked at me as if I had just arrived from Mars.
LIMITING WORDS CREATE A LIMITED LIFE
Most people have no idea that the words they use affect their feelings, experiences and behavior. The majority of people in our lives use very limiting language. If you were to listen to most of the people around you, you would be shocked to find out how negative their speech is. They complain, gossip, talk about how difficult things are now and how they probably won’t get much better. Then they wonder why their lives are not filled with joy and success. While it might seem like a good idea to regularly talk about things that bother you, you pay a huge price for doing so.
When you use negative words, whether knowingly or unknowingly, it impacts your feelings and behavior. When my friend talked about how depressed she felt, it actually contributed to her feeling sad and, as a result, she began to act as if she had no choices. Notice the sequence ? words create feelings and feelings impact behavior. It is almost impossible to act positively when you use negative words. (Note ? The phrase depressed as it is used above is NOT describing clinical depression. Prolonged feelings of sadness and hopelessness can be symptoms of a serious condition that needs the attention of a mental health professional.)
Your words impact your present experience and also your future. If you use limiting words, you will act in a corresponding manner because we always act the way we describe ourselves. I am a motivational and high content speaker. For years, I yearned to be more humorous and entertaining in my talks. However, using humor was a very big challenge for me. Why? Because I always described myself as motivational, not funny. So what happened? My audience members would comment about how motivational and inspirational I was. They never told me that I was funny. I finally decided that if I was going to be able to add humor to my talks, I had to stop saying that I wasn’t funny. I decided to be open to being more entertaining. The result? Over time I easily incorporated one liners and humorous content into my talks. People began to describe my style as motivational and highly entertaining. Amazingly, a number of audience members told me that I missed my calling and should have been a stand-up comic instead of a speaker. What happened; did I suddenly discover a funny bone? No. By stopping my negative words, I was able to let my natural wit emerge. (I still don’t have them rolling in the aisles, but at least my audiences and I have more fun.)
NOTICE YOUR ‘YUK’ FEELINGS
The first step in discontinuing your negative words (whether you say them to yourself or others) is to recognize when you are doing this. Here’s a clue. It’s what I call my ‘yuk’ feeling. Whenever I say something negative or limiting, I feel a negative sensation in my body. For me, it can be a sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach or stress down my spine. When I feel that awful feeling in my body, it is a clue that I am engaging in negative language.
Why does this happen? Most people know that the mind and body are inextricably linked. One affects the other. The words that we use also register in our bodies. If we use positive, upbeat words it allows our bodies to feel empowered, energetic, and ready to take action. If we use negative words, it causes stress or a “yuk’ feeling somewhere in our bodies. Determine where your ‘yuk’ feeling is. When you are experiencing a challenging situation, notice where you feel it in your body. Does your ‘yuk’ feeling express as a clenched jaw, tight muscles at the back of your neck, pressure at your temples or somewhere else?
DARE TO DEFY YOUR INNER CRITIC
Once you’ve determined that you are in a ‘yuk’ state, then pay attention to your language. You might be shocked at the negative things you have been saying to yourself and others. No wonder you’ve been feeling so stressed! However, just noticing these words is not enough. Remember, negative words affect your feelings and behavior so you must start to challenge them. Instead of telling yourself that you are overloaded and can’t possibly do all the work you have to do say, “Stop it!” You must quiet the inner critic. Tell yourself that, of course you will get everything done, because you always complete whatever you need to do. When you do this, pay attention to the ‘yuk’ feeling and notice that it has disappeared.
DESCRIBE YOUR LIFE THE WAY YOU WANT IT TO BE
One of the reasons that highly successful people are so outstanding at what they do is because they consistently use positive language. Again, optimistic words create positive feelings and actions. These accomplished individuals describe their lives and experiences in affirmative terms which causes them to behave in ways that lead to success.
The good news is that it is not that difficult to transform your words and behavior. Recently, I was having lunch at a professional meeting. I began talking to one of my table companions about exercising and having the motivation to continue a regular program. She told me that she used to be a regular fitness enthusiast, but she let it slide and now she couldn’t get motivated to work out on a regular schedule. After speaking with her for a while, I told her that if she didn’t stop saying that she wasn’t motivated to exercise, she never would be motivated to start and maintain a fitness program. I told her that if she wanted to make a change, she had to get rid of the negative way she was describing herself with regard to exercising. I also told her that awareness is the first step to making a positive change. Being aware of the negative language that we use, challenging it, and describing what we want instead, will allow us to take control of our feelings and behavior. A week later, my associate sent me a note and told me that I ‘motivated’ her so much, she got up at 5 AM to go to the gym and had been doing it several days in a row. She also told me that it was easy and she did not know why she hadn’t done it before. The reason it became so easy for her to change her behavior and do what she wanted to do was because she changed her negative language. When she used positive words, she did not need me to motivate her, she motivated herself.
So the next time you catch yourself saying something like, “I’m so depressed” or “I’m sick and tired of this,” stop it. Your words no longer have to mess up your life. Choose words that describe what you want to experience and watch what happens.
About The Author
Della Menechella is a speaker, author, and trainer who inspires people to achieve greater success from the inside out. She is a contributing author to Thriving in the Midst of Change and the author of the videotape The Twelve Commandments of Goal Setting. She can be reached at della@dellamenechella.com. Subscribe to free Peak Performance Pointers e-zine – send blank e-mail to mailto:subscribe@dellamenechella.com.
Bloggin for a Reason
For some it’s just a fun thing to do, while some others feel they will soon be left out; they soon join the crowd. Everyone who uses the internet knows someone who has a blog. Now what do you find in a blog that you dont find anywhere else? Nothing? If you are a friend of the blogger you visit his blog probably because you want a sneak peek into whatz happenning in his life right? don’t deny that? been there done that! oh, and if you are a blogger yourself you visit other blogs thinking that the other guy reciprocates.
So why do you blog? Ask yourself this question. If you can’t answer this I can tell you why you blog -
1. You wanted to be famous like the friend of yours getting all the attention? You want people to give you more attention and listen to you more.
2. You are socially disabled and the only contact you have is with the computer. You obviously have not taken a bath in a week or more. And you believe that the only people in existance on the planet are living on the internet.
3. You do not really care what people think about you. You want to drown others in your personal agony. You come up with some thoughtless contradictions that you think others will like to argue with you about.
4. You want to have a say in all things that is happenning around you. You want to talk about what you ate this morning, which side of the bed you got up etc. You have an agitated head that wants to express all the million bits of thoughts that is entering your head.
5. You want to be a self-proclaimed town crier. You think of those eyeballs of people who know you who are constantly looking for important updates about another person they know. You want to be the first to announce a friend’s wedding date that the others know about already. You want to keep the rumour mills turning.
6. You think you are very important in the society. They want your opinions to be read and heard. You want to give profound insights and meaningless thoughts that you feel will affect the society at large.
7. You want to be a writer and you are only practising your skills.
8. You have a lot of time and maybe you are even jobless at the moment.
If you said YES to any one of these and that is the only reason you blog, you probably need to rethink about what you want to do with your blog to put it to better use today.
Now I will tell you the reasons why I blog.
a. A blog is a very important source of information online. We know we are constantly on the lookout for more data to process and blog is an all important source. No denying that. I want to be a source of such useful information.
b. I have a business and I need to promote my business online. If I own my own blog? I can self promote my services to you and because you know me you are probably going to recommend me and refer your friends.
c. I know that Search Engines like contents. Blogs are a great way to get my site noticed by the search engines. Because a blog is fresher than static sites, search engines love to visit blogs to index them. If I talk about my business in my blog and put a lot of keywords related to my business, people are more likely to find me when they search for something in google and they find the link to my business site and visit it. Believe me internet works that way and this alone is a very good reason why you need to have a blog.
d. I want to establish myself as an expert in my field. The more people are going to hear about me and my business, the more likely they are to put their confidence in me.
e. Blogs are a great way to position my company in the eyes of my existing clients. In other words, giving it a more human face.
Here is what Jonathan Schwartz, president and chief operating officer of server maker Sun Microsystems had to say about blogs after he started his blog himself and found that it was a gold mine. “It’ll be no more mandatory that they have blogs than that they have a phone and an e-mail account,” Schwartz says. “If they don’t, they’re going to look foolish.”
Microsoft Chairman Bill Gates is considering starting a blog, says a company spokesperson. Filmmaker Michael Moore began a blog on July 4 to promote his controversial new movie, Fahrenheit 9/11.
I blog for a reason, do you???
Joji M John is the CEO of 2edge Solutions http://www.2edge.com, a webdevelopment firm specializing in ecommerce & CMS development. He also owns a number of successful websites.
For more information visit http://www.jojisayz.com
The Law of Attraction and Love
The Law of Attraction says that ‘like attracts like’. It means that whatever your predominate thoughts are will show up as people and experiences in your life. I used to get really angry with this idea. The people in my life were not the kind of people I wanted. The experiences in my life were not the experiences I wanted! Why couldn’t I seem to get this attraction thing to work for me? Why couldn’t I make things come out differently? What was wrong with me?
I hear the same thing from many of my clients. “What is wrong with me?” they ask, when the woman they are interested in does not show the same interest in them. Another client asked “Am I just stupid?” when she failed to see that the man she was dating was a closet alcoholic. “I feel like a failure.” Another client confided after another relationship that didn’t turn out the way he had planned. But the Law of Attraction works perfectly every time. It can work for or against you. Just like gravity. It can work for you to keep you from spinning off the planet, or against you if you lean too far over the edge of a cliff! But the Law of Attraction works through your thoughts and most importantly through the predominate thought you think most of the time. So if your predominate thought is that relationships are a lot of work, then you will attract partners and situations that are a lot of work. If your predominate thought is that all the good ones are taken, then you will tend to meet people you like and could be interested in, who are already in a relationship with someone else. If your predominate thought is that women are only after your money and you worry about having enough, then you will meet women who worry about money too. So begin to direct your thoughts toward what you want. How do you do this? First realize at your core you are a creative being. You have the power to expand the knowledge and experiences on this planet simply because of your unique perspective. So why not direct that creative power that is yours toward what you want? Start by noticing what makes you feel GREAT! Notice when you feel energized! Notice what settings or circumstances you are in. Notice what kinds of people make you feel joyful and loved. Make of list of all of these. And begin to look for ways that you can be that kind of person yourself.
For example if you are energized by hiking in the mountains or spending time at the seashore and you feel a sense of awe and excitement when you are in nature, make note of that. Then declare, “I am a magnet for a partner who loves nature as much as I do and is looking for a woman like me to enjoy it with.” As you declare this, out loud with enthusiasm, you are setting powerful creative energies in motion. You are igniting the Law of Attraction! That is the first step.
The second step is to know and accept that the Law will work and produce what you give your attention to. So if within your wanting to find that perfect partner you are more focused on the “wanting” and therefore on the fact that you do not have, then that is exactly what will continue to show up for you, more wanting and pinning over the fact that you are once again alone. To change this, begin to experience and visualize what it is like to have the person of your dreams at you side. That’s right, daydream! Vividly pretend! Get the feeling you will have when that person is right there. And accept that just as it takes three hours to drive from Denver to Glenwood Springs, it will take some time for your lover to get to you. So don’t get discouraged. Don’t give up.
Do let go of any sense of “wanting” and instead be joyous and energized by all that you do.
Finally, allow the Law to work for you. Trust that it is working for you. And go out and do things that allow you to feel at your best. Then just keep your eyes open and notice what shows up. Like Tom Hanks in the movie “Castaway”. You never know what the tide will bring.
Want to get a jumpstart on getting the Law of Attratction to work for you? Hire a coach. If you have not experienced the power of personal coaching, call me and ask for a free trial session.
Deb Melton, Singles Coach and Certified Fearless Living Coach lives in Denver and coaches singles all over the country to help them find their soulmate. Deb’s philosophy is, “It’s never too late to find the love of your life and live the life you love! Deb also offers teleclasses and seminars on a variety of subjects for singles of all ages. Whether you have never been married or you are recently divorced, Deb’s coaching and classes are interactive, fun and full of helpful information. Go to her website to learn more http://www.denversinglescoach.com
Get a Raise: How To Ask Your Boss For More Money
How many people do you know who think they deserve a pay rise, but are too scared to ask? You might even be one of those people! Why is it we are afraid to ask for what we believe we are worth? It’s time to stop worrying and start asking, but before you charge into your boss’s office give yourself the best chance of success with these helpful tips?then book that meeting with the boss.
Do an audit. Make a huge list of all your achievements in your current role. Think about where you add value to your organisation and how you have grown the business. List both demonstrable results such as statistics, sales figures, client testimonials and reports as well as those things that can be a little more difficult to quantify, such as improving staff morale.
Know what you’re worth. Find out what similar jobs to yours are paying in the market. Look at the same industry and other industries to determine what your market value is and what type of additional package benefits are on offer for similar roles.
Create your ideal package. Make a list of what you would like to receive in salary, car allowance, employee benefits, superannuation and time off. Look at the total dollar value of the package ? don’t focus only on the individual components.
Consider the organisational situation. Be aware of how the organisation is performing before you approach your manager. If times are tough, your proposal is less likely to be considered but if the company is performing well your manager might be more open to your request.
Book a time. Make an appointment with your manager and let him or her know that the agenda will be your remuneration package. Try to schedule this appointment for early in the day so your manager is not distracted by competing priorities and you are not spending a nervous day waiting for the appointment time.
Practice. Go over your presentation in your mind and perhaps even with a friend or colleague. Know what it is you want to say and why you believe you deserve this raise.
Objection! List all of your manager’s potential objections and consider how you would respond to them.
Be calm and positive. Take a few deep breaths before the meeting and remind yourself of why you deserve this raise and the positive impact it will have on your life. Don’t approach your manager timidly or they won’t believe you are worth the raise. Believe in yourself and your achievements.
Be aware of body language. Make sure you sit forward in your chair, your shoulders are straight, sit forward in your chair and make eye contact and smile. Try to appear relaxed and comfortable not nervous and fidgety.
Build your case. Before you launch into your presentation about what you want and why you deserve a raise, ask your manager these questions:
How do you feel I have been performing over the past few months?
Do you agree I have added value/sales/benefits to this organisation?
Are you happy with my performance to date?
Your manager’s responses to these questions will allow you to understand what his or her opinion of your performance is and help you to position your request in light of their responses.
Be assertive. Use positive assertive, not aggressive, language when you are making your case for why you deserve this increase; don’t moan or complain. Talk about the benefits to the company and to you.
Don’t blink, don’t look away. When you do tell your manager the total package figure you would like to receive, don’t blink and don’t look away. Hold their gaze and remain calm.
Allow your manager to respond. Remember, you’ve been thinking about this and putting together your proposal for some time ? this is the first your manager has heard about it, give him or her time to respond and process your request. Don’t talk while they are responding, let them talk through their thoughts and issues without interruption. Allow yourself to sit in silence if required. Don’t try to fill any silence with further explanation or justification.
Be flexible. If appropriate, let your manager know that you are prepared to be flexible in how the raise is provided to you perhaps is can be phased in, include a bonus or one-off payment or involve changing the structure of your current package.
Agree on a response timeframe. If your manger can’t give you an answer immediately, agree on a timeframe within which he or she will come back to you with an answer. Around one-week should be an appropriate amount of time.
Neen is a Global Productivity Expert: by looking at how they spend their time and energy ? and where they focus their attention ? Neen helps people to rocket-charge their productivity and performance. A dynamic speaker, author and corporate trainer, Neen demonstrates how boosting your productivity can help you achieve amazing things. With her unique voice, sense of fun and uncommon common-sense, Neen delivers a powerful lesson in productivity. Find out more at http://neenjames.com/
Article Marketing: How to Submit Your Articles at Turbo Speed
Want to become an article-writing machine? Here are a few tricks for submitting articles on the internet at top speed and accuracy.
As always, you should first type your article text into a Word document and save it on your hard drive. Many article sites offer space on their servers for your work, but ideally you should have a home for it on your own computer- just in case. Next, transfer your article text from your Word file to the article submission box. The quickest way to do this is to “set it all up” ahead of time.
Quick Copy-and-Paste Article Transfer
Start by finding a music CD of your choice that will get you into some kind of groove. Pop that into your Discman, CD player or whatever else you like to listen to your tunes on, and settle down in front of the computer. Take a deep breath, sit up straight, palm the mouse and then do the following:
1. Log in to your Ezinearticles.com account (or whatever other account you may be using to submit articles.)
2. Go to your existing Author Bio and hit Control-A (Highlight All) and then Control-C (Copy).
3. Go back to the Word file where your article is located and scroll to the end of your article, after the copyright line. Type Control-V (Paste) and add your bio text.
4. Now type Control-A (Highlight All). The text of your entire article and bio will be highlighted. Type Control-C (Copy).
5. Return to your article submission box and do a Control-V (Paste). Both the article text and the Author Bio will now be housed in the place where your article lives.
6. Scroll down to the end of your article text; that’s where the Author Bio is. You are going to remove it from here and pop it into the Author Bio box.
7. Highlight the Author Bio text with your mouse and then do a Control-X (simultaneous Delete and Copy).
8. Go into the Author Bio Box and Control-V (Paste). Your author bio should now land in the proper place.
Note: when writing articles for the internet, it’s wise to break up your text into easy-to-read sections. Bolded subheadlines will guide the reader’s eye down the page, thereby holding their attention on that excellent copy that you took such care in writing!
Here’s a formula for adding bold, ital and other HTML tags to your articles in a hurry.
1. Type your entire article in regular type, with no code.
2. Go to the first sentence that you want bolded and type your < B > code (but without spaces).
3. Highlight the HTML Bold tag that you just typed, and hit Control-C (for Copy).
4. Now go to the end of the line where you want the Bold to stop and hit Control-V (for Paste). Now add a / mark before the B in that end tag.
5. Scan the article from top to bottom wherever you want bold, copying and pasting tags where necessary.
6. Go back to the top and repeat the process for Italic, if you have that in your article too.
Bonus Tip: To get your mouse to the beginning or end of a long page of text (such as an article), type Control-A (Highlight All), and then the Up or Down Arrow. If you accidentally delete it, just hit Control-Z (Undo) and it should appear again.
A quick copy-and-paste routine like the ones I just described really comes in handy when submitting articles in mass distribution. Faster is better! Have fun.
Copyright 2005 Dina Giolitto. All rights reserved.
Find out how crisp, targeted copywriting can make a world of difference for your business. Dina Giolitto is a Copywriting Consultant with ten years of experience. Visit http://Wordfeeder.com for free tips on branding, copywriting, article marketing and more.
SEO Video
There are now a lot of business companies in the market, which are competing to reach higher market share and win the attention of the customers. As one of the business owners or managers, you have to know about the strategies that you should implement to cope with this situation so that your business can survive and be on the top position for success. Checking and maintaining the performance of your website is important, and you should also increase your customers by optimizing the search engine to get higher traffic.
Whatever products or services that you offer or produce, you should make sure to choose the right assistance to increase your traffic and place your website on the top of the search result. Whatever form of website you have, you can put it on the top position and create more attraction from the customers’ attention. If you would like to promote your products or services in the form of video, you can use video search engine optimisation to later on have your video website like in YouTube placed on top of Google search, Yahoo, Bing, and the other search engine including in video sites. This will make it easier for you to expose the value of your brand and your company, to introduce it to the market and people. This will also bridge your products to your segment or targeted market.
Get more information about the service of search engine optimization for video and see that this can be effective and give significant result to your number of visitors, making your company closer to higher profit and success. To get to know more about the advantages and benefits of their service you can also check out the links to their facebook and twitter page. Start your steps now to make your business well known and conquer the market with higher traffic and customers.
Dealing with Mr.Charisma
Do you ever find yourself in situations where you feel overwhelmed by the person who is speaking to you. It is as if their charisma and enthusiasm takes over and you just cannot seem to think for yourself. For a moment you are lost in a blur of their words.
The worst part is the fact that you cannot seem to regain composure or even assert your own opinion. What is the solution?
How to assert yourself in the face of a wave of charisma:
1 Break Rapport
What? Yes, break rapport but do so gently by adjusting your posture and by changing your rate of breathing. Mr.Charisma has you locked into deep rapport with his every word and every movement.
Until you regain your own pace, your own natural breathing rhythm and your own posture you will be subject to his lead.
Notice how you feel in your body, put some of your attention back onto yourself. Only then will you be able to think for yourself and to form your own opinions.
2 Filter The Words
Once you have regained a sense of how you feel and think in the present moment it is time to filter the words that Mr.Charisma speaks so eloquently. A filter will help you to maintain this sense of self and the ability to think for yourself.
A visual filter is easiest for some people. Imagine a wall in the air between you and him, a wall that filters the words so that you only hear the words without feeling drawn into his world.
Other people prefer a auditory filter. Imagine that your ears can be tuned in like a radio. You only hear the words not the way the words are manipulated to effect your emotions.
Choose a filter that appeals to you and use it to help you think independently so that you can evaluate what you are listening to. Why does this work? By using your imagination in this way, you are using the power of your right brain to help you get what you want.
3 Take Back Time
Take time out from the onslaught. Either ask directly for time to consider what is being said or occasionally repeat back what he is saying in your own words. By paraphrasing his words you will regain control of the flow of the conversation. You will also be showing that you are listening and understanding what is being discussed.
It is simple at this point to take charge by asking questions. Whoever is asking the questions is generally in charge of the conversation so use this skill to assert your authority. Then use this time to decide what *you* think.
Mr.Charisma can easily take charge unless you understand how to regain composure. Break rapport, filter his words and take time to formulate your own opinions.
Peter Murphy is a peak performance expert. He recently produced a very popular free report: 10 Simple Steps to Developing Communication Confidence. This report reveals the secret strategies all high achievers use to communicate with charm and impact. Apply now because it is available for a limited time only at: http://www.howtotalkwithconfidence.com/report.htm
